Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Blog Therapy

Today I am linking up to Tesha's here: Tesha's Blog Hop She posed the question about is blogging helpful for grief?

Here is my take on it................YES!!!!!!
Blogging about our loss, our journey through this, and how God is bringing us through has been so immensely helpful. It has allowed me to express my feelings openly when I didn't think I could find the words. It has allowed me to say things that I don't think at the time I could have verbalized. It has allowed my friends and family to really understand how I'm feeling even though I often times say we are doing just fine. Most of the time now I am doing ok. Most days are good days, but some days are still really bad days and this blog allows me to convey that. I also love that it allows me to connect to other mommies just like me. Us mommies who have lost babies often times feel very alone in this great big world and it is so nice to have friends who understand and will come beside you on those really hard days and encourage and pray for you. Real life friends and family are great and I wouldn't trade mine for anything but my blog friends who know exactly what I'm feeling are a blessing from God. Journaling our life has been so therapeutic for me. Often times in the beginning I would pick up the computer when I NEEDED to express my feelings and write as tears splashed on my keyboard. When I was done writing I would already feel better and have a new perspective. I agree that continually reading other peoples blogs where they are constantly in their darkest days can be very dangerous for a person who is still struggling. It's ok to be constantly in the dark for a time, most of us felt that way for some period of time, and as someone who has come from there it is nice to be able to go to those people and encourage them and see where I have been. I love reading blogs of other mommies who are ahead of me on my journey. Blogs where they are happy again and have incorporated their baby into their family beautifully even though they still miss them. They give me hope of what I have ahead of me. I really hope to make some of my blog friends "in real life friends" one day. These women have been an incredible support system for me and others, truly a gift from God.

Why is grief so taboo? Especially baby loss? Is it because it makes other's uncomfortable? Is it because people don't even want to acknowledge that babies die because that is so innately wrong? Whatever the answer is I hope that by mine and my friends blogging things will change for others. I hope that society will see that those that lose a child will never "get over it". That we may always be a different person because of our loss and that is ok. That sometimes, even years after our loss, something will remind us of the pain of our loss and we will gasp for breath in pain again. I pray that people will come to my blog and see that it isn't me that is strong, it is my God. It isn't my power or abilities that is getting me step by step further down this path. That is all my God's doing and for that I am so grateful.

6 comments:

  1. I'm visiting from Tesha's link up. Thank you for sharing your feelings--I agree blogging is beneficial and it does help. Remembering your precious angel Grant with you today. ((Hugs))

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  2. Love this Kristy I agree it is all God's doing. He is so good and gracious to have blessed us with each other where we can find love and support. I hope to meet my blog friends i real life also. I hope there is a baby loss convention we could all meet up at. I know Beth told that to Fran at still standing. Maybe someday.... wouldn't that be awesome :)

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  3. I agree that it was very helpful for me...in the beginning. I don't feel like I need it every day like I used to, but certainly on the hard ones. This whole month appears as though it will be a "hard one", so I am again enjoying the support and perspective of mommies walking the same path. I love being able to journal my own feelings and get them out without talking to someone face-to-face and breaking down. Hugs to you!

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  4. I'm so glad that you wrote on this, too! :) I also feel similarly -- that blogging is a gift from God.

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  5. i do like reading bloggs and have thought about doing one myself as there is so much i want to talk about i also love to talk about erin but i feel people get fed up with hearing about her. I find it difficult to explain to someone if im having a bad day i dont like to admit it but could easily write about how im feeling.I would just not know where to start!

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  6. So so true! Thinking of you tonight and hoping tonight is one of the better days for you...

    Nicki

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