Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Burst Bubble

My bubble has burst. My innocence bubble and my hope that my body may actually do something right bubble. After I delivered Grant I was told my cycles would resume in no more than 6 weeks. They were right. I didn't really expect them to keep cycling regularly though since they have never really done that before without medical intervention. I was instructed to start taking my metformin again for my PCOS, so I did. Lo and behold a month later another cycle without further medications. I was slightly sad that I wasn't pregnant again but I was actually happy that my body was doing what it was supposed to. I thought that hey, maybe being pregnant had kicked my hormones into gear. Jonathan and I had talked about how long we wanted to try to get pregnant on our own before we would be comfortable going back to the fertility guy, Dr. W. We decided that if we hadn't been successful by October we would go back. Fast-forward to the end of August. My cycle came again as it had done 4 times before without medication. I was disappointed and frustrated that I wasn't pregnant again. I called Dr. W to schedule an appointment thinking it would take me about a month to get in since I hadn't been there since last November. Not so. I had an appointment for today. It actually worked out perfectly. I should be mid-cycle today so I should be ovulating soon and they would be able to see it on ultrasound and confirm that my body was doing what it was supposed to. NOOOOOO. My body has apparently been fooling me all this time. My ultrasound showed absolutely nothing going on besides my PCOS. I was so flabbergasted and mad at my own body. How could it have tricked me like this? So, here we go again with hormones and an injection at the end. I'm really frustrated, and pretty sad, right now. I really didn't want to have to go down this path again. The medications make me feel terrible (and not so nice). It's just frustrating (have I said that already, sorry). I really hope that this works quickly this time. We are ready to welcome a baby home. Dr. W is starting me on the same medications and same dose that I took when I got pregnant with Grant. No need to re-invent the wheel. So, for my records, I will be taking 200mg of Clomid for 7 days along with 2.5mg of Femara the first 5 days. I will also have an injection of HCG at the end of it all to stimulate ovulation. I will start taking the medications on Friday.

Please let this work quickly and end in a healthy baby being brought home with us. 

10 comments:

  1. I am so sorry that your body has been doing this to you. Mine does the same! I hope that the meds & trigger shot work & you see positive news very very soon. Fingers crossed! I hope to get started with our injectable/IUi cycle in the next 2 weeks. I will be cheering you on!

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    1. Thanks Leslie. I will cheer you on also!

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  2. oh I hope it works quickly for you too!! How frustrating :(

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  3. Ugh...I am so sorry to hear this, Kristy. I think my body has been fooling me since last year as well! I've had regular cycles for over a year now and I've never had that before. I also started taking Metformin after Chase was born, but still...I kept thinking I would wind up pregnant with these "normal" cycles, but nope! So I actually have an appointment with our RE in 2 wks! Praying we can both get pregnant and bring home healthy babies SOON!!!

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  4. I am praying fort you, my dear friend! . We did fertility treatments (injectable meds and IUI) and were about to have to start with IVF and i finally got pregnant, only to miscarry our Avery. Then we did one more cycle of treatment and decided we couldnt take the roller coaster and we were grieving our loss. It was 2 and a half years after that before I got pregnant with Gideon. We thought that because he was such a miracle that we would get to bring him home w/ us. But, as you know he was stillborn. It is so hard to have infertility after a loss. I felt like my body had betrayed me time & time again.... My heart aches for you. I am praying for you, that as you hold Grant in your hearts, you will get to bring home a little sibling for him to hold in your arms.

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  5. Oh Kristy so sorry my friend. How I wish it was easier for you. I will be praying the medications work and you will be bringing home a baby brother or sister soon.

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  6. I know how scary and stressful it can be to get back on that TTC bandwagon again. I was terrified when we were "working on" getting Griffin. I wanted a baby so bad but not all the scary things that might come along with pregnancy again. Prayers for your heart and mind as you start working on your family plans again. May God bring your next little one to you quickly and with out any complications!

    Lots of love to you today! xoxox

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  7. Praying for you as you begin fertility treatments again.

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  8. Your very last sentense says it all when it comes to my prayers for you!!! ((HUGS)), Kristy!! :)

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