Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Lets Be Honest.....I Don't Love It

Warning: Talk of breastfeeding involved. Don't continue if you don't want to read about it :)

I love, love, love being a mom. I love sweet baby cuddles, smiles, giggles and squeals. She is precious and perfect and I wouldn't trade this for anything. What do I not love then? Breastfeeding/pumping. I really really wanted to, but I don't. I actually despise pumping. I can't wait until she is no longer taking breast milk. I want to give her breast milk until 1 yr, that has been my goal. I don't hate breastfeeding as much as pumping but I don't love it. I like that it's our quiet time. Only me and her. I don't like how she has a terrible latch (always has) and that I still have to use a nipple shield. I don't like that she is super distractible so what should take15 minutes takes 30 and instead of it being a relaxing experience I am always having to try to get her attention again to get her to re-latch. I'm sure some will say that I should enjoy this because I'll miss it when it's over, and you know what, maybe I will. I've learned to never say never when it comes to parenting. I may miss our early morning sessions where she is still sleepy and looks at me and smiles. I know that I most likely won't miss being attached to a machine for 15 minutes at a time every 4-6 hours when I can't breastfeed.


  1. Been there...felt that way!! I struggled with both of our biological children. I was one of the 1% of women who truly have a supply deficiency, despite nursing/pumping 12x/day, taking reglan, eating oatmeal, etc. I pumped exclusively for both of them once they discovered how much easier getting milk from a bottle was. By the time I pumped for Ava, the pump started talking to me....delirious much?? I made it a year with her (with Jacob I had kidney stone surgery and dropped to below 7 ounces/day of production at 6 months). Being a mommy is tough and sometimes the ideal world just isn't reality! How awesome that you're still trying! Hang in there...you're doing great!

  2. Ahhh...I can remember quitting pumping when Jake was 8 months, and I swore I'd never do it again. I stuck to my word when Parker came because it left that huge of an impression on me. Just couldn't bring myself again. In other words...I feel ya!!!