Frozen Yogurt With a Friend

Last week I met a good friend to chat and enjoy some frozen yogurt. I love anything "ice cream" and that love is even more while I'm pregnant. This friend understands me so so well. She too lost a son just last year. She even just had another baby this past spring, almost exactly 1 year after she lost her son. We don't get to hang out often enough because life is busy but when we do it is so amazing. I love spending time with her and sharing life together. We hung out and chatted for a few hours and it was nice to be able to openly talk about the fear that comes along with being pregnant after a loss. This pregnancy has gone so well. Amelia is healthy and so am I but I am still scared that something could go wrong. I told myself at the beginning of this pregnancy that I would thank God for everyday that I get with this baby and that is exactly what I do. I am not guaranteed tomorrow and I am determined to be thankful for today. It doesn't matter how tired I am or how badly something hurts, I am so so thankful for this time with her. Feeling her squirm and wiggle is the greatest reminder that there is life growing inside of me and that I am blessed.

I think that we've handled the stress/anxiety of pregnancy after loss pretty well. I have my moments where I begin to freak out that something is wrong with her if she doesn't move as much as I think she should but I am able to calm myself down by talking with God and sometimes calling my OB. Can I just say that my OB is the best doctor any woman could ever ask for? She is AMAZING! I seriously love her. She has been so understanding this whole pregnancy and has offered to do more monitoring anytime I am nervous. Our Maternal Fetal Medicine specialist has done more ultrasounds than normal because he knows that it will make me feel better to know that she is ok. Our team of doctors is wonderful and I am so thankful to have such caring people on our side.

I am so looking forward to the day that I will hear this little girl cry for the first time and see her sweet face. I am also a little scared. I don't know what to expect with my emotions. I know the day will be bitter-sweet. I know that the future will be bitter-sweet at times also. I miss Grant all the time and wish he was here but if he was here this little girl wouldn't be. It is such a conflicting feeling.

A Little Bit of Everything

I've been gone from here for a while. Life is so crazy busy right now and I am exhausted at the end of most days. I'm going to do a bullet point type post today to update and then I will try to keep this thing updated.

- I am now 31 weeks and 1 day pregnant with Amelia Kathryn. She is doing wonderfully and is growing well. At my appointment last week I was measuring about 2 1/2 weeks ahead. We know she is measuring quite long on ultrasound and have another ultrasound scheduled for July. I am going to the doctor every 2 weeks now and love hearing her heartbeat. That sound never gets old.

- I have my next baby shower this coming Saturday and we are so excited.

- Work is going well but man am I tired at the end of each week. Working nights is always exhausting by the end of the week but now I feel like I could sleep for days come Saturday morning. I go back to work tonight. As of right now I plan on working until I go into labor or my last shift that is scheduled 2 days before my due date. I want all of my time off to be with my sweet girl.

- Jonathan is taking summer school this summer and is taking about 7 hours. He is taking 20 hours in the fall! I'm so proud of how hard he is working to get done. Only 3 more full semesters and he will have his college degree!

- We got to spend the weekend with Destiny and Adrik this weekend. We picked them up on Thursday night and took them home on Sunday. It was so much fun getting to hang out with them for the whole weekend. We realize that we are blessed to still have this relationship with them and to continue to build a relationship with their parents. We went bowling, to the water park, saw Monsters University and hung out at home. We were really busy but had so much fun. I realized today that I didn't take a single picture this weekend but we were so busy enjoying time with them I didn't even think about it.

- My mom came down this weekend also. I loved getting to spend some time with her. We stayed up too late at night and got up too early in the morning but it was nice to sit and talk. On Sunday she helped Jonathan hang the curtain rod in Amelia's room. We also arranged the furniture the way we wanted and put her rug down. Soon I will have her room put together and organized and then I will show it off!

- We paid someone to paint a mural on Amelia's wall recently and I LOVE IT! It is so sweet and I will show it off when I show pictures of her completed room.

- I have made a to do list of things I need to get done before she arrives and last week I was able to cross off a few things. Mostly the ones crossed off are things I am making for her. I still have a few things to sew and hope to work on them this week.

I think that's it. I'll make sure to take pictures of the things I've made for her room and for her and do a post of those soon. I'll also do a combined baby shower post after this weekend.

House Happenings

We have lived in this house for almost 2 years now. We decided just over a year ago that we really like this house and that we would try to buy it this spring. We closed on our first home a few weeks ago! Buying a house is incredibly stressful but it was made a little less so by the fact that we didn't have to move. This is the house that Grant and Amelia were conceived in. It's the house that we came home to after we said goodbye to Grant and will come home to when we bring Amelia home for the first time. It's the house that Destiny and Adrik spent the majority of their time with us in. We live right down the street from an amazing school as well as from great friends. We have a huge yard that the dogs love. This is the place for us for the next 5 years at least. One day we will outgrow this house and need one a little bigger but that day is in the distant future. When we moved in here our house had white carpet, white/off white walls, white lineoleum floors and white laminate counter tops. There was white EVERYWHERE! We have painted a few rooms before we bought the house and painted even more right before closing. The only rooms that still need to be re-painted are the kitchen/laundry room and both bathrooms. The week after we closed we had new floors installed in the entire house (except for the bathrooms). We no longer have any carpet! We put laminate hardwood in the bedrooms, hall and living room and we put tile in the kitchen/laundry room. We also had our old white laminate countertops and white backsplash removed and replaced with granite counters and a new tile back splash that is tan. The house looks amazing! I'm so glad to have it all completed and fresh before Amelia comes. Here are some photos. I didn't take any of the counters before and only took one of the carpet. Next up....new stove and washer/dryer to be delivered next week.

Kitchen Floor Before

Living Room Floor Before

Kitchen Floor After

Kitchen Floor After

Amelia's Room

Laminate Wood!

Living room After

Entryway After

New Countertops, Dishwasher and Back Splash

New Countertop and Sink!

Happy 7 Years!

Today is our 7th wedding anniversary. I can't believe it has been that long since we got married. Most of the time it seems like just yesterday that we were newlyweds and here we are celebrating 7 years. I am married to the most amazing man in the world. I know he's my husband and I may be slightly biased but seriously, he's amazing. I love having Jonathan as my husband and best friend and can't wait for the next 77 years together. Our love and relationship continues to grow and mature every year. We have been through many ups and downs together that have just made us a stronger couple. I couldn't ask for a better man to be married to. Happy 7 years to us!

First Baby Shower

We celebrated Amelia this past Saturday at our first baby shower. Some of my really good friends from here hosted it and it was amazing. Lots of great friends came to celebrate with us and pour out their love on us and Amelia. My Mom and Dad drove down for the day so my Mom could go to the shower with me. My sister missed out because she was vacationing in Hawaii (I was actually a little jealous of her). We got lots of good presents for Amelia and most of all I had a great time celebrating this baby with great friends.

I only cried twice during the shower. Both times were when someone gave me something that said "Little Sister" on it. They weren't really sad tears or happy tears. It makes me so happy to have friends acknowledge that Amelia is in fact a little sister. The day was a little sad also, knowing that this is one more thing that I didn't get to do with Grant. It was mostly a wonderfully happy day full of celebration.

I'll post some pictures once I get them uploaded to the computer.

Amelia is Growing

We had another doctor appointment today and Amelia is growing perfectly. I actually lost a pound, woohoo!, likely because in the last few weeks I have had a stomach bug twice (boo). I know you aren't supposed to lose weight while pregnant but for a chubby girl it's actually not a bad deal. As long as Amelia is growing my doctor said it's just fine :) Don't worry, I don't plan on dieting.

Today was a great day for another reason. Jonathan felt her move for the first time. It was amazing! She moves like crazy but is quite ornery and will stop when I call him over to feel her. We start our every 2 week appointments now and have another ultrasound next month. Yay for healthy baby and healthy mommy.

Busy Busy Busy

It seems like my to do list just keeps getting longer even though we have been really busy lately. Jonathan and my mom painted Amelia's room and our master bedroom a few weekends ago. I'll post pictures when things are complete. Our room still needs some artwork for the walls and we need to find curtains for the windows. I really like the new colors in there though. Amelia's room needs a touch up coat of paint and in a few weeks a woman is coming to paint a mural on one of her walls. I can't wait to see the finished product. This week I need to finish painting her dresser and start painting her bookshelf. When those are done I will be done painting (hopefully). We are also going to paint the guest room this week so we can trade beds with my mom this coming weekend. In a few weeks we will be getting new floors and I can't wait to start setting up Amelia's room. Things are really starting to come together. It seems like August 25th is still a really long time from now but it also seems like it is coming up incredibly fast. I can't wait to see this baby girl and hold her. We are also in the process of buying the house we currently live in. Hopefully we will close on it in the next couple of weeks so we can get started on the floors. Ahhh, so much to do!